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1 Manipulative behavior/people on Mon Dec 14, 2009 8:53 pm

gypsy


Moderator
http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/life/5-behaviors-of-manipulative-people-549848/



Many of us like to think the best of people. We like to think that they shoot straight and are forthright in their intentions. We also like to believe that they will ask for what they want and not resort to crazy tactics to get it. Unfortunately, however, there are times when we come across those who will do whatever it takes to get what they want…including manipulation. Being manipulated never feels good, but the worst part of manipulation is that often, we don’t even realize that it is happening. Here are a few ways to know if someone is trying to manipulate you:

1. Buttering You Up: To get their way, manipulators will often make you feel good so that they can then ask you to do something that they want. The person may first compliment you or tell you what a wonderful job you did on something. Making you feel good will, in their mind, make it difficult for you to say no…after all, you wouldn’t want to disappoint them or give them reason to think you didn’t deserve the compliment in the first place. What you can do: Return the compliments and the niceties before saying no.
2. Guilt: This doesn’t only pertain to Catholics and Jewish Mothers; guilt trips have been a successful manipulation tactic for centuries. The saddest part of this strategy is that the victims of this tactic succumb to the manipulators’ demands because they feel they HAVE to, not because they WANT to. In personal relationships, this sets up a co-dependency that is extremely unhealthy. What you can do: Ask the individual if they want you to do something because you have to or because you want to. If they say they want you to want to do it, tell them that you don’t and that they are trying to force you into something you don’t feel comfortable with.
3. Broken Record: Probably the most obvious of formats is the broken record tactic. If a person asks you enough or pushes their agenda enough…constantly repeating the question or request over and over again…in slightly different ways, the victim will inevitably give in and give them what they want. Oye! What you can do: Ask the individual what they don’t understand about the word “no.” Tell them that asking you over and over again isn’t going to change anything and that they are inappropriately over-stepping boundaries.
4. Selective Memory: This one gets me the most. You swear you have a conversation about a plan and everyone is on the same page, and then one day, the manipulator pretends to remember the conversation completely differently, if at all. What you can do: Record your conversations…seriously! Okay, maybe not. At least have a witness that you can count on to back you up if the person pulls this shenanigan. Call them out on the fact that they conveniently change the game to fit their needs.
5. Bullying: If a person doesn’t get their way, they make you out to look or feel like the bad guy…like you are the wrong one. What you can do: Be firm and tell them that their bullying tactics are inappropriate and unacceptable.

2 Re: Manipulative behavior/people on Mon Dec 14, 2009 9:04 pm

runawayhorses


Owner
Yeah well, regardless of all of that, I still think Fred Astaire was a fag..

3 Re: Manipulative behavior/people on Mon Dec 14, 2009 9:07 pm

gypsy


Moderator
haha , I have no idea.if he was or not~ I like your humor

4 Re: Manipulative behavior/people on Mon Dec 14, 2009 9:21 pm

runawayhorses


Owner
Ok, thank you.

I'll leave you alone now so you can believe in something else, maybe something like Liberace was straight .. lmao

(Wladziu Valentino Liberace (May 16, 1919 – February 4, 1987))

Just messing with you Gypsy, for comedy purposes, you're always a good sport, thank you.

5 Re: Manipulative behavior/people on Mon Dec 14, 2009 9:35 pm

gypsy


Moderator
no Liberace wasn't straight//but he sure could play those ivories..I have just a small talent/education playing the piano..
Wow! do I respect his talent.. What is funny ,women loved him.

Thanks Tyler I do try to be a good sport~ I like fun here, not the conflict//can I say that?
oops I already did.. Also your not bothering me.. this is fun banter~

6 I want to wish you a Merry Christmas on Mon Dec 14, 2009 9:41 pm

gypsy


Moderator

7 Re: Manipulative behavior/people on Mon Dec 14, 2009 9:59 pm

runawayhorses


Owner
OK, good. :)

Well, to get on track here about Liberace, and to add more humor, he actually wasn't a very good piano player at all. In fact, he was considered a bad piano player by professional musicians. Anyone that knows music understands Liberace was not a good piano player. He was all show, and a fag. He danced his hands around on the keys in a elegant fashion does not cut it or prove you are good. He wasn't a good piano player, simple and factual. But in his credit, I will say this, he was a great showman, and took charge of the crowd, but a real piano musician? No, he was not.

8 Re: Manipulative behavior/people on Mon Dec 14, 2009 10:04 pm

gypsy


Moderator
ok, he looked good doing it!! LOL
On that subject who was the greatest pianist?

9 Re: Manipulative behavior/people on Mon Dec 14, 2009 10:13 pm

gypsy


Moderator
don't know if this is the greatest//but he is good


10 Re: Manipulative behavior/people on Mon Dec 14, 2009 10:25 pm

gypsy


Moderator
Howard Tuvelle is excellent~ also

11 Re: Manipulative behavior/people on Mon Dec 14, 2009 10:42 pm

runawayhorses


Owner
Here is the greatest piano player in my opinion. lol.. No not really, but Avril does a great job. She doesn't claim to be a great piano player. Shes a singer/songwriter first and foremost. The best piano player would be someone from Jazz music. I'll post some tonight or tomorrow.

Anyway, Here's Avril singing her song, and even playing the piano for this one. She also plays guitar and the drums on her live shows.



12 Re: Manipulative behavior/people on Mon Dec 14, 2009 10:51 pm

gypsy


Moderator
very talented Avril is/like her/

if you can play multiple instruments/especially piano/violin are very hard..

I love a good pianist/violinist I Love Allison Krauss ,love her..

13 Re: Manipulative behavior/people on Mon Dec 14, 2009 11:24 pm

gypsy


Moderator
I decided not

14 Re: Manipulative behavior/people on Mon Dec 14, 2009 11:48 pm

gypsy


Moderator
ok I need to explain I was going to put whiskey lullaby///so beautiful/so sad~

15 Re: Manipulative behavior/people on Tue Dec 15, 2009 5:34 pm

rosco 357


Veteran
well on the piano, and i have my dads LP Floyd Cramer, who my dad liked, that i think was in the 60s,
but i have not heard him in so long i forgot how he played, here are 2 old ones i found





16 Re: Manipulative behavior/people on Tue Dec 15, 2009 5:38 pm

gypsy


Moderator
Very nice Rosco enjoyed hearing those

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