ONE OF THE HORSES
At Heathrow, a 300-foot long red carpet is stretched out
to Air Force One and President Bush strides to a warm but
dignified handshake from Queen Elizabeth II.
They ride in a silver 1934 Bentley limousine to the edge
of central London where they board an open 17th century
coach hitched to six magnificent white matching horses.
They ride toward Buckingham Palace, each looking sideways
and waving to the thousands of cheering Britons lining
the streets, all is going well.
But suddenly the right rear horse lets fly with the most
horrendous, earth-rending, eye-smarting blast of
gastronomic flatulence ever heard in the British Empire,
including Bermuda, Tortola and the Falkland Islands. It
shakes the coach.
Uncomfortable, but under control, the two dignitaries of
state do their best to ignore the whole incident, but
then the Queen decides that's ridiculous. She turns to Mr.
Bush and explains, "Mr. President, please accept my regrets.
I'm sure you understand that there are some things that
even a Queen cannot control."
George W.Bush, ever the gentleman, replies, "Your Majesty,
please don't give the matter another thought.You know, if
you hadn't said something, I would have thought it was one
of the horses...."